Movie Theater Stabbing: He’s Done!
by Jim Washburn
A short article in today's LA Times that bears mention: At a packed showing of Shutter Island in a Lancaster movie theater two weeks ago, a moviegoer asked a woman using a cell phone to be quiet. She and her two male companions left the theater, but the two men returned shortly after and plunged a MEAT THERMOMETER into the neck of the complaining man, seriously injuring him.
Who the hell brings a meat thermometer to the movies? Maybe at a screening of Julie & Julia, but Shutter Island? Or did they leave the theater, go to the market, buy the thermometer, return to the theater and ask the ticket taker, "May we go back in? We forgot to stab someone."
Comments
Well, you know what they say: If God hadn’t meant for us to eat animals, he wouldn’t have made them out of meat.
As my friend Jonathan once posed: If meat is murder, are carrots mail fraud?
Personally, I’m not as opposed to killing animals to eat them as I am of the crappy lives they have on factory farms until then. Would I kill an animal myself to eat it? Probably not, so I’m a hypocrite, but a less frequent one these days, except for when we hit Cuba, where even the napkins are made of pork, I understand.
Another reason to go vegetarian; if no one ate meat, there would be no meat thermometers, and fewer people would be stabbed in the neck.
2010-03-10 by Nathan the editor